The Art of Parenting

Well I may not be a parent, but since I have parents I guess that makes me somewhat qualified to discuss this topic.  I think the key thing to remember when it comes to parenting is that you do your best, and you need to trust that the guidance you gave your child will help him or her make good decisions.  In the end, we all make good and bad decisions.  The important factor is that we learn from our mistakes. 

My parents both work full time jobs so they did not do the “attached parenting” thing, and I had a babysitter, who they trusted.  My mom and I talk about parenting in reference to how she tried to raise my brother and me and in terms of how I would want to raise my future children.  She always tells me that it is important to guide your children but at the same time allow them to be independent enough to make decisions on their own.  My parents feel that it is critical for us to understand the importance of working hard.  If we gave our best in the classroom and at home, we were given more opportunities to be independent and to use this newfound freedom to learn and grow.  My parents gave us a $5.00 a week allowance for all of the chores we did so that we would learn the value of money.  If we wanted to go to the movies or buy a game, we had to save our allowance, until we were old enough to get a job to pay for our activities and wants.  My parents challenged us to pursue our strengths and improve on our weaknesses.  Above all, they just wanted us to be good people and treat others with the same respect that we ask in return. 

Two thing that bother me are carrying a child around as an accessory as in Jong's Mother Madness and seeing the books about “how to be a great mom.”  A child should not accent the clothes that you are wearing or be used to prove a point. Motherhood isn’t one of those things that you follow by the book.  Each child is different and requires a different type of nurturing.  There’s no one-way to do it.  No one should try to tell another mother how to raise their child like or require breast-feeding like Gisele Bundchen wants in Mother Madness.  If there were a lab manual on how to raise children that actually work, we’d have a bunch of angels running around.  I’ve yet to see that so I think we need to treat each child as an individual and raise that individual to the best of our ability and hope that we did the best that we could.  There will be days that they fall, but it’s important to be there to pick them up and put them back on their path.