Rape/ Sexual Assault

“Rapes were not rare and isolated acts committed by individual Serbian or Yugoslav forces, but rather were used deliberately as an instrument to terrorize the civilian population, extort money from families and push people to flee their home,” concluded Human Rights Watch.  The fact that this continues to happen as a war tactic shows that we have a very corrupt society that needs to wake up and realize that these women have families just like the women in their lives do.  I can’t even imagine what these women went through.  Hearing Drita’s story about being dragged away from her home broke my heart.  I would never feel safe again.  This reminded me of being at Geisinger this summer when a 17-year-old girl came in and was have suicidal thoughts because she had lost her mother and her stepbrother was raping her.  She seemed so fragile, and I don’t know how you can help someone out of a situation like that.  She will constantly struggle with trust issues and will always feel as the article says, “ruined.” 

The other thing that really bothers me about this article is that these women are so afraid to talk about their sexual assault because they terrified that they will be blamed for what happened.  The married will be banished and the single will never find a husband.  They must feel so trapped.  We are fortunate to have outlets that make people feel comfortable.  I feel very lucky to have people who I can turn to in times of need.  On the other hand, these women have to hide their beauty with dirt and hair so they will not be selected out of a crowd to be assaulted.  These women have such graphic nightmares.  I don’t know if I would ever be able to sleep again.  Not only is their world torn apart through the physical destruction of their home and village, but also the emotional destruction. 

When I was reading 28 Stories of AIDS in Africa, this same topic came up.  Some of the women were raped but they would not tell their husbands for the fear of them being exiled.  Thus, they spread AIDS to their husband and their children.  In other cases, when the husband was sleeping with prostitutes and his wife, he would blame the wife for giving him AIDS and then banish her, when in reality it was the prostitute who spread it. He did not want to be caught as the bad guy so it was easier to blame it on the woman.